After another epic Halloween party, I am exhausted, and I’ve finally fallen victim to the cold I’ve been fighting off for a week. I plan on watching Halloween movies and handing out candy to Trick-or-Treaters tonight, all while in my sweat pants. Awww yeah. Happy Halloween everyone!!
I’m assuming if you’re still looking for costume ideas, you probably have a party to go to tonight. At this point, you’re probably scrambling through your closet, desperately looking for something fun and unique. I have the solution: ZOMBIES!! But not just any zombies. What costume do you have laying around already?
Prom Queen – Zombie Prom Queen! The Prom Queen of 1984 has risen to relive her former glory!
Bride – Zombie Bride or Corpse Bride! (Or you can add a samurai sword and be The Bride from Kill Bill).
Gypsy – Zombie Gypsy! Dance erratically, and maybe carry a skull instead of a tamborine, or just carry a skull.
Think about how your character might have died, and you can add a whole ‘nother layer of humor. Think deaths like the movie Beetlejuice.
Punk – Zombie Punk! Were you crushed to death at a concert? Or did someone force you to listen to Justin Beiber, so you killed yourself?
Cheerleader – Zombie Cheerleader! Maybe you fell off the top of the pyramid and broke your neck. You could wear a neck brace all night to hold your head up.
Geisha – Zombie Geisha! (Works for Oni as well, or a samurai) If you can find a plastic samurai sword and make it look like you got stabbed through the stomach with it, you will have my un-dying respect.
You could also be a famous person who’s dead, or a character who dies in a movie.
You could be zombie Citizen Kane! Dress in a suit and carry a broken snow globe. If you want to take it really far, carry around a scorched wooden sled. Sometimes I am so funny I can’t stand it.
Also, again if you have a geisha costume laying around, you could be Lucy Liu’s character O-Ren Ishii. And if you can find a way to have the top of your head cut off, I want to steal it.
Zombie basics: At Halloween stores they sell “zombie makeup”. It reminds me of Elmer’s glue. You put it on your skin in layers, then it dries, and you peel chunks of it open to make faux skin flaps. The trick with this stuff is you have to let it dry thoroughly between the layers, and do many, many layers. Read the directions on the package, and plan your time accordingly. Don’t forget you’ll need lots of fake blood!
I’m going to call this “Seemingly normal costumes with a clever twist”. These are mostly geared toward girls, since that’s how I tend to dress. Shocking, I know. At least I know my strengths.
Ghost of a Bridesmaid – This is a great reuse for that old bride’s maid dress in the back of the closet. If you can carry around a wilted or dried out bouquet, that would be awesome. I am all about props. Use black eye shadow to make big shadow under your eyes, and hollowed out cheeks. Streaked and smeared eye makeup and lipstick would complete the look, and you can wander around repeating, “Always a bride’s maid, never a bride”.
Troubled Teen – Slutty Catholic school girls are a dime a dozen this time of year. If you want a unique twist on it, add a giant fake pregnant belly! I made a super-realistic (like people were asking me all night if I was really pregnant) one for maybe $4. I used a gallon sized ziplock bag, filled it with polyfill (the stuffing from the craft store), and taped the corners down to make it rounder. I wore a stretchy, white tank top over this to hold it in place, which also helped round it out, and look more realistic. Then your basic white button up shirt, pleated skirt, and neck tie, hair in pig tails, and leather shoes. You can add knee socks, and a metal lunch box if you have them.
Surprisingly Hot Girl – How many eighties movies start out with a nerdy girl who turns out to be hot after a simple make over at the end of the movie? Start the night with your hair up in a bun, with glasses on, wearing a ratty, huge sweater and sneakers. Halfway through the evening, take off the glasses, take down your hair, and take off your sweater to reveal a super cute dress. Switch from sneakers to heels, and your transformation is complete!
Oni – If you have the makings of a geisha costume laying around (and who doesn’t??), you can become an Oni, or Japanese demon very easily. This one works for guys or girls.
You can google Kabuki makeup to get ideas for patterns. Add a fan or plastic samurai sword, and put your hair in a top knot.
Just so everyone knows, Pandora has a whole Halloween radio station! For the perfect ambience while decorating or for a Halloween party!
At this point in the month, lots of people are running around like crazy attempting to get together some kind of fast, but interesting costume, without spending 80-bazillion dollars at the Halloween store. Lots of amazing costumes can be made from thrift store finds.
You could be a mormon, Jehovah’s Witness, or Televangelist very easily.
Mormon: Short-sleeved, white button-up shirt, ugly tie, navy pants, dress shoes, hair parted on side. You can make a name tag fairly easily, if you want to ge that detailed, and carry around a Bible or Book of Mormon if you have it. If you want to really get into character, ask people if they’ve heard the good news all night, and smile at everything. If you don’t already own most of this outfit, getting it at a thrift store should be very cheap and simple.
Jehovah’s Witness: Think really horrible 1980’s floral prints, and just really unflattering clothing. Also carry a bible, and act like a Mormon, as listed above.
Televangelist: You could be someone specific, such as Tammy Faye Bakker, or just a televangelist in general. You’ll need: a terrible suit (white would be fantastic, but work with what you have), a boring tie, carry a bible, and if you have a microphone, like for the Rockband video game, that would be awesome. You can also probably get one at a thrift store in the toy section. If you want to get into character, walk around speaking in an intense Southern accent, put your hands on peoples’ foreheads, and command them to “Heal!”. If can cry on command, you are golden. You could carry around rubber snakes also, if you want, but that’s a specific sect. You could also be The Farting Preacher, which might be hilarious, or disturbing.
For Tammy Faye Bakker: I really loved Tammy Faye for her early gay rights activism, and she was an amazing lady, so I hope anyone dressing as her will do it without making fun of her. The outfit obviously consists mostly of giant, clumpy eyelashes, and big hair. A brightly colored women’s pantsuit or dress suit should be easy to find at the thrift store. Big hair and bright lip stick will complete the look. You can always smear mascara down your cheeks for her trademarked just-been-crying look. You can also watch the movie “The Eyes of Tammy Faye”. It’s fantastic, and will show you what I love about her.
I’ll have more ideas coming, but the best way to get ideas, for me at least, is to go to the thrift store and dig around. Find some ridiculous garment, or something that reminds you of a particular celebrity, and use that as your jumping off point. If you’re completely broke, dig through your closet, and even friends’ closets, and try to look at everything with new eyes.
UPDATE: Beans contributed the idea of Jan Crouch:
I have never heard of this lady, but she’s another female Televangelist; the poor man’s Tammy Faye, if you will. That wig looks super fun!
There are many factors to consider when buying Halloween candy for neighborhood kids. Here are some simple rules to follow:
1. NO RAISINS. RAISINS ARE NOT CANDY. Raisins are barely even food; do not give these to anyone. This is one step above giving kids dusty old mints you’ve collected from restaurants year round and found when cleaning out your purse. This is also one step below leaving your light off and not handing out candy at all. Yes, they are that bad.
2. Buy something you like, so you can eat the leftovers, if there are any, but not something you like so much that you’ll eat all of it before Halloween. You can also consider buying chocolate so you can use the leftovers for any of these cakes.
3. Don’t buy it too early, or you will totally eat it all. Right now, Halloween is in about a week, so this is the perfect time to buy candy. The stores are never going to run out of candy, so there is no rush to buy early.
4. Don’t buy something cheap and disgusting. If you really can’t afford to spend $3 on candy, just leave your light off and hand out nothing. Seriously. Leave the dollar store candy at the dollar store.
5. Guidelines for amounts to buy are tough, because it all depends on where you live. Two bags is generally plenty for my neighborhood, but I’m sure other people need different amounts. If you’re not sure, you can ask a neighbor, or just make sure and buy something you don’t mind eating (see #2).
Halloween is all about fun, so just go crazy and have a blast!!
The other day, the pillow case I lovingly hand-crafted for my body pillow randomly tore open. I guess those things aren’t made to last for 10 years. Until I have time to make another one, I need something temporary. I grabbed a twin sized sheet, and spread it out on the bed. IGNORE THE MESS BEHIND THE CURTAIN.
When I rolled the whole thing up, there was a long tail hanging off each end…
…so I tied it in a knot.
It looks like a big piece of candy! And now I can cuddle it comfortably, which is the most important part.
In spite of the fact that I have not posted anything even remotely “Deep Clean” related in awhile, I have actually continued to clean things. Yes, really. I mean, a little. So the other day, when I couldn’t jam anything else into the linen closet, I broke down and reorganized it. Here is a once-in-a-lifetime: a before picture of my mess. I know! This never happens!! Behold! THE CLOSET OF HORRORS!!
Tinkerbell decided to “help”.
I basically took everything out, folded it all properly, and separated everything into categories. It’s amazing how well stuff fits once it’s folded. I also put things we don’t need often, like beach towels, in the hard to reach places out of the way.
I did all this while rewatching old Friends episodes. Not too shabby!
I had never had homemade refried beans until a friend of mine opened my eyes to the amazing possibilities. We make them for breakfast tacos, but they are good any time of day. For this recipe you’ll need some cooked beans, preferably pinto or black, garlic, garlic salt, and either bacon or olive oil, depending on your preferences. I start out by cooking some bacon.
While that’s cooking I chop 4-5 cloves of garlic up very finely.
Oh look! Beans that are already cooked, as if by magic! (I’m like Rachel Ray, but with a normal-sized mouth).
Once the bacon is mostly done, start the garlic browning. If you’re making vegetarian refried beans, brown the garlic in olive oil. Turn the heat down pretty low for this.
I use garlic salt and sriracha to flavor mine, and the potato masher will be very important in a minute. I don’t just take photos of random crap on my counters, this is all part of my plan.
Put a bunch of beans in the pan and mix in the bacon fat or olive oil. Let that heat up a little bit.
Once the beans are warm, smash them with the potato masher (see? The plan! I had one!). Warm beans are a little easier to squish than cold ones, in my opinion. Once you have everything smashed thoroughly, let the beans cook a little more. You want to cook off some of the liquid until they reach a consistency you like. But remember, the beans will thicken as they cool, so let them cook until they are slightly runnier than you’d like. That way, when you serve them they should be just right. If your beans are too dry you can add warm water or olive oil a little at a time to get a consistency you like.
I made these beans into breakfast tacos with the bacon, but I ate all the results before I took a picture. Meh. I had plenty of extra, and I’ve made quesadillas also, which were amazing. This process is way easier than I thought it would be, and it’s very easy to make a small batch to experiment. You can use canned beans, or beans you’ve cooked from scratch yourself. And it’s an excuse to eat bacon!
Now that the coffee is brewing, I can sit down and write a good old fashioned crafting post. I still haven’t had any yet, mind you, so don’t expect me to be coherent. This is actually a project I started awhile ago, so this post will encompass part one. Today we’re taking a pull-over sweater (which I hate), and turning it into a normal sweater that opens in the front. All pull over sweaters do is ruin your hair and create the possibility that you’ll flash someone, which is why I don’t wear them. For this part of the project you’ll need a sweater to cut open, basic sewing supplies, and ribbon to finish the edge. For part 2, my plan is to embroider an octopus on the back, but we’ll see if that ever happens, or if I die of frustration first.
Step one: cut the sweater open! You should probably use a ruler or something to make sure you do it relatively straight. Here’s a close up to show how I sewed the edges of the sweater. I didn’t quite hem it, since I didn’t want to lose that much width on the sweater. Once that was done, I lined up the ribbon along the edge, and folded it over, then pinned it in place.
Here you can see the completed project!
And this is what happens if you ask Hubby to take a picture of you, but you aren’t specific about what you want:
This last weekend, Hubby and I trekked our way all the way North, into Yankee territory. That’s right, we went to Dallas/Fort Worth. They have an awesome sci-fi convention up there every year called Star Wars Fan Days. We were both in costume, reveling in the awesome nerddom of it all. Here’s Hubby, dressed as Obi-Wan Kenobi, fighting a young Jedi, while Princess Leia watches in the background.
This was an almost completely handmade Ahsoka costume, that I thought was pretty cool.
This girl is dressed as a Dalek from Dr.Who!
These three chicks were roaming the convention together. On the left we have Mara Jade, who later marries Luke Skywalker, not sure about the Sith in the middle, and then an awesome Princess Leia on the right.
Hubby posing with an amazing Lando Calrissian. He won the costume contest this weekend, and deservedly so.
I was dressed as the Baroness from G.I. Joe, but of course, didn’t manage to get one picture. Tons of people took pictures of me, so I’m hoping to stumble across one I can post later. It was a ton of fun, but I still hate driving in Dallas. I swear, every construction barrel in a three state radius is in that city. Have you guys ever completed a single road? You might want to invest in some engineers.