Dear Dishwasher
Dear Dishwasher,
What the hell are you doing?
You’re making lots of noise and steam, but you sure aren’t washing any dishes. I don’t ask much. I generally rinse dishes before they go in, and I don’t make lasagna or other “baked on messes” like they show in the commercials, but you seem to have trouble even removing soup residue from bowls.
I don’t know why. I mean, I give you that magic blue stuff that you guys are supposed to love so much, I get the liquid detergent you’ve enjoyed in the past, I clean the garbage disposal for you, and I even let you run empty sometimes, just to get you in the mood.
Why is this suddenly not enough for you? I know we’ve had our problems in the past, but I thought that was all behind us. Have I done something? I’ve preheated your water, run you with vinegar, and done everything else I and everyone on the internet can think of to make you happy.
Let’s face it, you’re basically creating more work for yourself. Each dish that comes out dirty is just going right back in, so why don’t you just save us all some trouble and do your job. It’s in your name, for the love of Dawn: you’re a dishwasher not a dish moistener.
Love,
That Clever Chick
