Star Wars: The Drinking Game
Apparently my Star Trek drinking game post riled up a few of my Trekkie friends. I’m still friends with them in spite of their Trekkiness, yet that’s not enough for them. One had to write a rebuttal post. It’s not as clever as mine, but who could even come close to that level? I normally don’t post on even-numbered days, but since the guest blogger is Black from Two Tokens, and Friday is their traditional posting day, I’ll allow it. Sit back and enjoy some good natured Star Wars mockery:
For those that do not know, ThatCleverChick is a bit of Star Wars fan. And by a ‘bit’, I mean huge, and by ‘fan’ I mean raving lunatic. She’s called me out on my own geek blog for my many indiscretions regarding Star Wars canon. Everything from name spelling to the anatomical accuracy of a Yuuzhan Vong warrior has been scrutinized under her ever-watchful gaze. She’s chided more than once for my love of Trek. She even refuses to call the show by name, but rather refers to it as “that show with 10 white dudes sitting around negotiating peace treaties.”
I think Star Trek is a far better moniker, but to each their own.
Understand folks, I’m not a Trekkie/Trekker or a Star Wars fanboy; I consider myself an enthusiast of all of the above. However, there comes a time when the scales of nerdom are tipped; and they must be righted so that balance may prevail. That being said, I feel it’s only right to level the playing field. So, grab a Romulian Ale and get comfy. Let’s run down a list of what a Star Wars drinking game would look like – shall we?
1. Anytime brother and sister kiss, drink a beer.
2. Every time Obi-Wan Kenobi loses a fight, drink a beer.
3. Every time someone says “I have a bad feeling about this”, drink two beers.
4. Anytime Anakin seems like he’s going to the ‘dark side’ when in actuality it’s just him being emo and bitching, drink a beer.
5. Anytime someone falls down a shaft, drink a beer.
6. Do three shots every time Jar-Jar says me’sa or something stupid. Check that…only do half a shot, I don’t want any hospital bills.
7. Anytime someone is captured, and instead of killing them, Darth Vadar allows them to escape – finish whatever drink you have.
There’s plenty more, but I’ll leave you with that for now
Clever Chick’s commentary: I only had you people doing shots, because there are so many things that give you the urge to drink in Star Trek, I wanted all of you to restrain yourselves. You’ll notice that Black, however, is trying to get you super drunk, quickly so you don’t realize how far it is between drinks. He also focuses on mocking the prequels, whereas I took the high road, and left the original Star Trek alone, since I know you are all justifiably embarrassed about it. I wouldn’t want to rub salt in your wounds. Someday soon, Black and I will get together and bury the hatchet, probably by creating a Battlestar Galactica drinking game.